Tuesday, November 21, 2000

today was uneventful. well, not really. i admitted out loud to someone I am still jealous of the girl's new friends. I admitted not caring about "another" girl's boyfriend (she's not really another girl, she was actually the first this semester. She's a great person... it just so happens I still like to make her smile...). I write morose poetry on my door for a certain someone to see, then deny it if anyone asks about it. I should erase it.
Anyway, I have an 11:00 class tomorrow, and I am a day sleeper, so it will be hard to wake up. My roommate doesn't have class tomorrow. Asshole.

Monday, November 20, 2000

this weekend was great. i drove home to Charleston and was home for 2 hours... long enough for me to grab some winter clothes and eat a homecooked meal. I ate soup. yum. I drove up to Myrtle Beach to seee Hootie and the Blowfish with my brother at the House of Blues. It was one of the best concerts they have ever put on and one of the best I have ever been to. maybe it was because of the hot girl behind me that had her hands on my back giving me the occasional massage. Maybe it was the hot girl I was holding hands with "because I wanted her to squeeze my hand if she felt faint again or needed something." Maybe it was because it was Hootie and the Blowfish. No. It was because it was the first time my brother and I were together at a concert. We've been to a lot of concerts together with other people. We usually don't stay in the same place. This was the first time we stood together. It means a lot to me at least. We were less than 5 feet away from the stage. It was awesome!
I did a lot of thinking over the weekend too. You know how some people think that their lives are little tests that God puts them through to strengthen them? What if my life is bascially Satan's tests? All these failed relationships (girlfriends, friends, family) are ways to deaden my heart and prepare me to destroy the world? What if I am to be the next Anti-Christ? Too bad I am not joking. It is a destructive life I lead. I would hate to let down someone as powerful as Satan. Then again, i would hate to let down someone as powerful as God. But, I like rooting for the underdog. LoveSongs For UnderDogs.
Well, its late and I have a project to do tomorrow. i will probably end up hurting more people tomorrow... not to mention myself. Well, onlt time will tell. Night all!